Many want to start a sincere relationship with God and we all know we should pray, but how do we go about it? Is there a right way or a wrong way to pray? Well, let's go back to the basics and let's start with how to pray.
Welcome to answers from an apostolic faith.
In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit, One God. Amen.
My beloved, today we start a new series called Back to Basics. In this series, we speak of the practical side of the spiritual life; the how to of the most fundamental elements of the Christian lifestyle. And we cannot possibly begin this series without first talking about prayer. And so in this first video of the series, we will attempt to answer the question of How do I kick-start my prayer life?
First, let’s address a very crucial point in regard to the spiritual life: always keep in mind that the Christian is called to be in a relationship with the all Holy Trinity. We are called to know God and to be known by Him. And so, the Christian must always keep at the forefront of his mind that all that we do is in pursuit of a genuine relationship with God. And so, as we discuss prayer, this is not in any way an attempt to teach you how to mechanically go about prayer as if this were some sort of instructional video on how to stretch or how to build a dining room table, no! This is more an attempt at explaining the different ways and the different set of tools that our mother the Church has set before us to connect and be united to God in and through prayer. And so, before we begin, let me share three key things that I want us to consider:
Number 1: We ought to know that prayer is not the repetition of empty ritual. Rather, prayer is the soul’s attempt at union with her Creator. It is a state of being, not merely an action of spoken words. While the words given to us by the Church are extremely powerful, they are of no use unless they pour out of a sincere heart.
Number 2: Prayer does not need to be complicated. God isn’t seeking poetry or sophistication. David the psalmist says this clearly when he says:
''The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and (...) contrite heart ─ These, O God, You will not despise.'' (Psalm 51:17)
Even The Lord Jesus Christ speaks of the righteous tax collector who asked for forgiveness in his prayer and the Lord says:
''I tell you; this man went down to his house justified...'' (Luke 18:14)
My beloved, the Lord isn’t so much concerned with the quantity or the quality of our words, but rather the state of our heart. He desires us, personally, more than anything else.
Number 3: Prayer is not limited only to my bedroom, but to be spoken at all times and in all places as the heart desires. Now, this in no way means that I ought to stop setting time aside to stand before God's face in the privacy of my room, but it means that, on top of this, we ought to also have God in our hearts and our minds everywhere and at all times. Now, St. Basil the Great, he counsels us and he says that we ought to have God in our minds in every little thing. He says the following:
''When you sit down to eat, pray. When you eat bread, do so thanking Him for being so generous to you. If you drink wine, be mindful of Him who has given it to you for your pleasure and as a relief in sickness. When you dress, thank Him for His kindness in providing you with clothes. When you look at the sky and [at] the beauty of the stars, throw yourself at God’s feet and adore Him who in His wisdom has arranged things in this way. Similarly, when the sun goes down and when it rises, when you are asleep or awake, give thanks to God, who created and arranged all things for your benefit, to have you know, love and praise [your] Creator.'' (St. Basil the Great, Homily 5)
And so, in this we learn, while personal time in our prayer in our bedroom is essential, communication, or rather, communion with God at all times and in all things is also necessary.
Now, before we discuss some of the ways we can begin to pray, I would like to share with you one last and most essential idea about prayer... In order for me to succeed in having a consistent prayer life, I must see prayer as a non-negotiable. Communion with God must be at the top of my list of priorities, not merely something I work towards if I have time. Think of it this way: we would never consider going to school or to work without first washing our face in the morning, or brushing our teeth, or even getting properly dressed. To us these are all things that are non-negotiables. We will not face the world unless I have done these things. Why then do I not see prayer or my standing before my God as just as important as these tasks? If I don’t dare go to work without putting on my work clothes, do I really believe I can face the day without first asking for God's grace and His blessings? No, my beloved: prayer must be a non-negotiable. I must believe that I cannot begin or end my day without it.
And now, what are some of the ways that the Church sets before us to begin praying? Today we will attempt to briefly discuss five ways that can all be used when pursuing a relationship with the Lord. Let’s begin with the most communal and formal way: the liturgical prayer life. Over the centuries, the Church, who is in love with her Saviour, has decorated her liturgical prayers with beautiful words, with hymnology, doxologies, and even scriptural readings, so
that it can present to both God and the people the best that it has to offer. And so, in the Orthodox Church, where we celebrate Divine Liturgies, Matins, Vespers and other forms of liturgical worship, the Christian person is exposed to beautiful prayerful language where one of the models of prayer is made accessible to them. This then becomes a school where we can learn the language and the demeanour of prayer, where we see before us the example of true offering and Eucharist, where we hear the words of Holy Scripture, and we have set before us examples of the saints that have become victors in their relationship with God.
Another tool and a second model of prayer that the Church makes accessible to us is the canonical book of the hours. In the Coptic Orthodox rite, this is known as the Agpeya. In this book, the Church offers its children a model of structured prayer. It teaches us how we ought to begin with thanksgiving and then repentance when we recite Psalm 51. It is then filled with the beauty of the psalms, the readings of the segments of the Gospels, and then litanies and other prayers that the Church handed down to us in order to elevate our hearts to God. And while some people may express that they have difficulty reciting words that are not their own, I urge them to adopt a different perspective. See this as you would see a greeting card: while the words that were written are by another, they often express what you could not put into words. And so, as we read the words of the psalmist or the words of the Church, let them inspire us to then add to them our own words, and in so doing, be in communion with God.
Now this leads us to yet another model of prayer: the free cry of the heart. This third model is when the heart simply overflows: in thanksgiving, in supplications, in repentance, in the pursuit of mercy, in the remembrance of others, and many other things. For some, this is difficult, because, in the beginning, we lack the words to express what we want to say. The heart knows, but the tongue lacks the experience of expression. And this is where liturgy and the Agpeya or the prayers written by the Church can be of great use. They teach us the vocabulary to express what the soul is seeking. For others, it comes easily. It flows naturally as simple prayer. Fr. Matthew the Poor, a great contemporary teacher in the Coptic Orthodox Church, says the following in his book called the Orthodox Prayer Life. He says:
''[Simple prayer] is an intimate and fervent discourse in which the soul speaks with God, its creator, expressing its feelings. Such feelings may be glorification of his works, attributes, or wisdom, or thankfulness for his mercy and his transcendent and humble care. Here, the soul might be afire during this silent meditation and thus could not bear to keep silent any longer. It breaks forth into unchecked words that express love, worship, (...) submission, as a child expresses (...) his feeble words his strong feelings. The heart, which quakes with the touches of the hidden hand of God, is thereupon laid open before him.” (Father Matta El-Maskîne (Matthew the Poor), Orthodox Prayer Life: The Interior Way)
This fourth model that the Church lays before us as a tool of prayer that we will look at is the repetition of short and very powerful sentences. A great example of this is the very well- known Jesus Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, Son of [the living] God, have mercy on me, a
sinner. Another short and powerful prayer is the one recommended to us by St. Macarius the Great who, when his disciples asked him how they ought to pray, he simply answered:
“There is no need at all to make long discourses; it is enough to stretch out one’s hands and say, 'Lord, as you will, and as you know, have mercy.' And if the conflict grows fiercer say, 'Lord, help!' He knows very well what we need and He shows us His mercy.” (The Sayings of the Desert Fathers, St. Macarius the Great)
Lord, as you will and as you know, have mercy. Indeed, a very powerful and helpful prayer to memorize and to repeat throughout the day. And I believe that the simplest of all prayers is that which the Orthodox Church repeats many times throughout her prayers: Kyrie Eleison! ─ Lord have mercy! All of these are great examples of short and powerful sentences that a person can repeat and have on their heart all throughout the day as they're driving, as they're standing in line to get coffee, as they eat their supper and even as they speak to others. This is how we can pray everywhere and at all times.
Finally, the last tool and model of prayer that we will look at is silence and stillness. This is when a person can simply sit before the Lord and, from the stillness, receive grace because of the awareness of God’s presence, just as two lovers can sit quietly in each other’s embrace without saying a thing and not feel the need to express a word because their presence is sufficient for them. And so, even this, the silent and still heart, is yet another way that the Christian can commune with God in a perfect state of prayer.
My beloved, as we have seen, our Mother the Church sets before us a collection of tools, all of which can help us build a sincere relationship with our God. Not one of these is more or less important than the other and everyone is meant to use all of them at some point and all throughout their lives. And now that we have seen some very basic ways on how to pray, I urge all of you to speak to your spiritual guides and fathers of confession so that through their guidance and in a spirit of discipleship, you may be properly counselled as to which of these to begin using so you can start your journey in prayer.
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